Swing Life Away
by Xstrawberry0fieldsforeverX
Summary: She didn't feel wanted at home. He didn't feel safe. As they get to know each other better, they realize that they understand each other. [CraigxEllie]
1. Killing Lonliness

The dark haired boy jumped down from the ledge of the window and sprinted out of his yard. He didn't know where he was going, but he knew he had to get out of there. As soon as he knew he was far enough away from the yard, he stopped his sprint and began to walk at a fast pace. He zipped up his leather jacket as the harsh autumn wind blew, and turned where he saw the entrance for a park. It was deserted. Well, of course it was deserted, it was, afterall, near midnight. Closing his eyes for a brief moment, he tried to clear the memories of tonight from his mind, and continued walking until he could find a place to rest.

"Craig Manning," said a voice, causing the boy to jump. He turned around, saw a young redhead sitting on a bench beside a tree.

"Ellie Nash?" he questioned, unsure of the girl's identity.

"What are you doing here? It's like 12 am, or something," she told him.

"I should be asking you the same question," he replied in an accusatory tone. She took a deep breath, looked away, then back at him.

"I…"

"Sorry," he apologized quickly, "I didn't mean to get mad. You just scared me is all."

"It's fine. What are you doing here anyway?" He turned away, planning to run off, as he had done many times earlier that day.

"You don't want to tell me…"

"You didn't tell me why you're here…" He pointed out.

"I asked you first," She reminded him.

"Look… I just don't want to go home right now…" She made a small tutting noise, looking down at the ground.

"I know the feeling…" He sighed, looking down at his feet. She glanced over at him, causing him to pull his leather jacket further around himself.

"So…"

"So…" She repeated. They both sat in silence for a while, listening to each other's rhythmic breathing, crickets chirping in the background.

"Why do you do that?" He asked, referring to the redhead who was constantly snapping elastic bands on her wrist.

"None of your business," She snapped, turning away from him. He nodded in response, sitting down next to her on the bench. She scooted over, letting him.

Looking up, he had a view of a small playground across the park. And he remembered a time when there was someone who cared about him. A time where he could stay at home without being afraid, A time when he didn't have to sleep in a park at 12 midnight just for his own safety.

Glancing over at the dark haired boy, she too remembered a time when she could come here to have fun, not just for her own safety. That time was over for both of them. It had been for a while. But tonight, no one was there for either of them, so they relied on each others company. Neither spoke a word, but knowing one was there was comforting enough for the both of them.

_With the warmth of your arms you saved me,  
Oh, I'm killing loneliness with you  
I'm killing loneliness that turned my heart into a tomb  
I'm killing loneliness_

**_Killing Lonliness- H.I.M._**

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**A/N: This is NOT a one shot. I'm planning to continue it. I just wanna know what you think, although the chapter was short, my other chapters will hopefully be longer... Please review. I'd love to know what you think of it. Also, this takes place in season 2, Craig still lives with his dad, and Ellie's mom is an alcoholic, while her dad is gone.**


	2. I'm A Fake

_Crack! He cried out in pain as the leather strap pelted him again. Pools of crimson streaked the boy's back and the ground around him. _

_"You're just like your mother," the man stated, his harsh words cutting in as he pulled the belt back again. Crack! Tears streaked the boy's cheeks, and he shook violently, wishing, praying that the pain would end soon._

_"I-I'm sorry," the boy stuttered out, his tone pleading for mercy. "I shouldn't have left." He apologized._

_"I-I'm s-sorry," He spat viciously, mocking the boy. He pulled back the belt once more and…_

"Craig." Someone was shaking him. "Craig," The voice repeated. His eyes slowly opened to reveal that Ellie was the one shaking him. Ellie? What was Ellie doing here…?

"Craig!" The voice was louder, more urgent. He opened his eyes and looked around. It was still somewhat dark outside, and thick fog covered the air. The park was gloomy, raindrops drizzled from the sky, and the memories from the previous night came rushing back to him. His dad, running away, Ellie…

"Craig?" The voice said, yet again.

"Wha…?" She frantically got off the bench, picking up her bag from under it, and shook him once again.

"It's 7 am already. We're going to be late for school," she explained hurriedly, brushing the dirt off of her, and fixing up her hair a bit. Craig practically jumped out of his seat.

"What!" He practically shouted. He picked up his bag as well and sprinted off to school with Ellie. Checking his watch, he realized he had to be there in 10 minutes, which was definitely not enough time to run from the park to the school. Craig knew he'd be late, but that was the least of his worries at the moment.

They arrived at school, ten minutes late, each receiving a small warning from Mr. Simpson, and being told to sit down. Craig walked over to a computer and sat down next to Ashley, who in return gave him a small 'hey'. He gave her a small smile in return, absentmindedly removing his leather jacket, revealing scars from the night before. Dried blood stained his shirt, while burn marks covered his arm. Receiving a puzzled look from Ashley, he quickly realized his mistake. He pulled his jacket back on immediately, and looked around to see if anyone had noticed. Thankfully no one but Ashley had seen. Or so he thought.

"Hey, what happened?" Ashley whispered, as Mr. Simpson continued his lesson. _'Think of a lie… Think of a good lie… You… got in a fight…?' _Craig thought to himself, trying to avoid telling her anything.

"I…uh… I was out late last night… I… left my camera in the park. So I went back to get it… I got in a fight with these guys that were out there…" he explained quietly, lying through his teeth. Ashley gave him a skeptical look for a moment, then her expression turned to concern.

"Are you okay?" She whispered, moving her thumb over to examine his split lip.

"Yeah," he told her, quickly moving away from her touch. "I'm fine."

The day went by quickly. Too quickly for Craig's liking. As he stepped out of the school building after the last bell had rung, he wished he had somewhere else to go besides home. Seeing a certain redhead trudge out of the school building, he stayed behind to walk with her.

"Hey," He said.

"Hey," she muttered back. "So… apparently I'm a couple of guys who got into a fight with you last night?"

"What?"

"That's what you told Ash, anyway," Ellie explained.

"She told you that? I-"

"Chill," Ellie said, rolling her eyes, "Tell her whatever you want. I don't care."

"Look… Ash is staying after for some environmental club thing with Emma. Want me to walk you home?"

"Oh goody. I get to walk home with Craig when Ash isn't around!" she said in mock excitement.

"I didn't it like that… It's just-"

"Whatev…" She said, speeding up her pace. Craig quickly caught up with her.

"Look-"

"Are you stalking me now? First you come into the park yesterday "coincidentally" when I was there, and now you're following me home?" She rolled her eyes, snapping her elastic bands absentmindedly.

"No… I just thought… maybe we could be friends…"

"Because we talked for one night? You thought wrong." She snapped the elastic bands more frequently as they drew nearer to her house. Craig continued to walk with her. "Why are you still following me!" She asked, annoyed. Why was he following her? He had no idea. Perhaps it's because he needed someone to talk to. Or perhaps it was the fact that the longer her walked with Ellie, the more time he had before he had to go home.

"Why are you getting so angry with me!" She turned away.

"It's nothing…"

"Are you okay?" He asked, a hint of concern in his voice.

"I'm fine. And I don't need you going all Ash on me, anyway," She told him, making fun of how Ashley worried over everything and everyone. Craig smirked, causing her to give him a small smile back. She realized where she was, then frowned again. "Well… this is my house," she said, walking to the door. She slowly opened the door, just wide enough so that she could fit through. "I'll see you tomorrow." Her attention was distracted when the sound of breaking glass rung through the house. She ran in the house, quickly shutting the door behind her.

"More like see you tonight," Craig said quietly, as he turned away from her house and started back to where he lived. He wasn't going home. No, 'home' wasn't the word for it. It was a place he dreaded to go. A place that never seemed to welcome him. A house, maybe, but 'home' wasn't the right word for it.

**A/n: Please, please, please, please, and I know this is going to sound annoying, but I want more reviews. I have at least 100 hits, and only 2 reviews. I have no life! Reading reviews will give me something to do! Plus I want feedback. But, I would like to thank the two of you who reviewed…**


	3. Jeremy

He continued walking home, pondering the events of yesterday and today. He didn't want to be nosy, but there was something about Ellie that intrigued him. His trail of thoughts was broken off when he heard the angelic voice of his little sister, Angela.

"Craig!" He turned, realized he was walking past the Nelson's house. Emma stood in the yard with Angie, grinning at him, waving slightly.

"Hey!" He greeted, as he walked over to the two.

"Hey, where were you?" Emma asked, "You usually come by earlier."

"Emma and I were drawing with chalk again," Angie interrupted, smiling as she pointed to the drawings along the sidewalk. "She tried to draw a dinosaur, but I told her no one could do it the same way you did."

"You made fun of my dinosaur last time," He replied skeptically, a smiled still on his face. "But you're right. My dinosaur is the best one." Yes, _dinosaur_. That's exactly what it was, to them at least. He knew what the dinosaur really was. He knew what the dinosaur really looked like. Glancing over, Craig realized that Emma's eyes were on him. He turned away quickly to avoid eye contact, and stared at the ground.

"What happened?" She asked, worry clear in her voice. He looked away, sought for the same lie he had told earlier, then turned back to her, still avoiding eye contact.

"I got in a fight last night."

"With who?" She inquired, moving her thumb over one of the cuts under his eye. He flinched, pain piercing through his body.

"Are you okay?" The naive dark haired girl asked, the brilliant smile fading from her face, and instead, being replaced with concern.

"Yeah… Fine," He lied. Lying had become a second nature to him. Almost everything he said was a lie. _'Are you okay?' 'I'm fine.' _Lie. _'Where were you last night?' 'Hanging out with Sean.' _Lie. _'What happened?' 'Remember that dinosaur…?' _All of them were lies. In fact, not even one person knew the real him. And he was fine with that.

"Craig, do you want to draw with us?" He stopped, considering it. That was more time until he had to see his dad… But then again…

"Craig?" Emma tried to gain his attention, waving her hand in front of his face. He shook his head, snapping out of it, and opened his mouth to say something.

"Daddy!" Angie called, running over to the bright red sports car where her father was. Joey exited the car, a silly grin plastered on his face as he picked up his daughter, hugging her.

Craig watched with envy. Was there even a time he could remember when his father had smiled at the sight of him? Had he ever looked forward to the end of the day where he would see both Craig and Julia? Craig somehow doubted it.

"Craig, what are you doing here?" Joey asked, the grin slowly fading off his face, and the once excited look had been exchanged with a look of concern. "What happened to you?"

"Nothing. I have to go," he replied quickly. _Lie_. He quickly said goodbye to Emma and Angie, and ran towards his own house.

It seemed as if he had stood outside, staring at it for hours, though it had only been minutes since he'd arrived at his house. He watched the house, his eyes darting to the car in the driveway, to the dark oak door, as if daring himself to go in. Craig knew he should have been walking in, but his legs wouldn't budge. _'I dare you to go in,' _a small voice appeared in his head. _'Double dog dare you,' _the voice taunted, knowing his fear all too well. _'The dinosaur won't hurt you today,' _the voice lied, as he had done so many times before. 'Shut up!' he wanted to tell it, but didn't. _'The longer you wait, the worse it'll be…'_ He nodded to himself, walking over to the door, and slowly turning the old brass knob.

"Dad?" He called, knowing he'd soon get his response. The house, however, was unusually quiet. "Dad?" Still no answer. He entered with caution, his eyes darting nervously back and forth between the walls. He slowly put his backpack down on the floor, and started down towards the darkroom. So far, so good. _'He's here, you idiot. Didn't you see the car in the driveway?'_ Suddenly, a hand roughly grabbed his shoulder, turning him around.

"Where the **hell** were you, Craig?" The man grabbed his arms roughly, throwing Craig into a shelf.

"Did you leave in the middle of the night?" Albert demanded, kicking the boy in the stomach. The boy, using all his strength, frantically tried to get up before he could endure another blow to the stomach. He had almost gotten up, only to be shoved to the ground. He fell at his father's feet, bleeding, tears stinging in his eyes. _'Close, but no cigar.' _The voice teased, as if this were a game. A cruel game to the boy, where someone who spends their whole day healing others only comes home to destroy him. Again, he tried to protect himself, by slowly advancing from his position, desperately attempting to get away from his father. In response to this, he suffered a blow to the head.

"D-dad," he chocked out, blood spraying from his mouth as he spoke.

"D-dad," His father mocked him. "Do you know what time it is?" Craig slowly shook his head. "I didn't think so. Next time, you're home when I want you to be, and you don't just get up and leave in the middle of the night." He kicked the boy once more, then left the room.

The boy lay there alone, bleeding, crying in anguish at any attempt to move. He knew this was his fault. He shouldn't have left, fallen asleep at the park with Ellie. He shouldn't have stalled time until he came home. Craig shouldn't have seen Joey or Angela. He shouldn't have stopped to talk to Emma. _'Then there's nothing wrong with what he did,' _the voice explained. _'Because it **is** your fault anyway." _Craig didn't disagree. All he could do was lie there and tolerate the pain. _'It **is** my fault. It's always **my** fault,' _he thought to himself, and then everything went black.

_Daddy didn't give affection  
And the boy was something that mommy wouldn't wear  
King Jeremy the wicked  
Ruled his world _

Jeremy spoke in class today  
Jeremy spoke in class today  
Try to forget this...  
Try to erase this...  
From the blackboard

**Jeremy- Pearl Jam**

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**A/n: What do you think? Next chapter is going to mainly be about Ellie...**

**And... yeah... I'd still love more reviews... **

**But thanks to all the people that reviewed last chapter xD**


	4. I'm So Sick

The petite redhead quickly closed the door behind her, making sure the boy couldn't see inside. She heard glass shatter from the living room, followed by a small moan.

"Mom?" She called, walking into the living room. Her mother lay, sprawled out on the unattractive sofa in the middle of the living room. Vodka bottles, shot glasses, and wine bottles decorated the floor, some shattered into small pieces. She sighed, walking over to the mess to clean up the alcohol bottles.

"Mom," She said, recieving silence in response. She sighed again, snapping the elastic band that hung around her wrist. Ellie shook her head. It wasn't working. It wasn't enough. She grabbed the rest of the alcohol bottles, then walked outside, dumping them in the large metallic trash can, positioned in the front of her yard. She walked back in the house, into the small kitchen, and opened the cabinet that her mother used to hold the alcohol. Ellie picked up a small bottle of whiskey, tempted to pour it down the sink and throw it away. As she placed her hands around the top of the bottle, she heard a low moan from behind her.

"…Eleanor?" The older woman called, slowly rising from her position on the sofa. "Eleanor, what are you doing?" Ellie jumped, her hands releasing the whiskey bottle, and she watched in horror as it shattered to the floor.

"Ellleanorr…" Her mother slurred, making her way into the kitchen. "What-" She was cut off when she suddenly rushed to the bathroom to empty the contents of her stomach.

"Shit…" the redhead muttered, bending down to clean up the mess. The smell of alcohol burned through her nostrils, the glass pieces lay scattered on the floor, as if tempting her. _'Ellie…' _They called out to her, _'Just once more… Just once more and you'll feel better.'_ She shook her head, declining. _'Just once more…'_ The girl quickly wiped up the mess from the floor, and began to pick up the shattered glass. It lay in her hand, as she walked over to the garbage can. _'Just once more…' _

_'Okay,' _she thought to herself. _'I'll only do it one more time. Just one more…'_ She threw away all the glass pieces, keeping one for herself.

Walking to her room, she passed her mother who was exiting the bathroom. The woman had bags under her eyes, unruly hair, and smelled of cheap alcohol. Ellie shook her head, tried to keep walking.

"Eleanor… Can you make dinner? I'm not feeling too well…"

"I'm sure you aren't," Ellie muttered through gritted teeth. She turned to face the woman, putting on a fake smile, hiding the glass behind her back. "Of course, mom. I'll get to it in a minute." Her mother nodded in response, trudging her way back to the living room.

Ellie smiled to herself. _'Just once more.'_ She walked into her room, closing the door behind her, locking it. Right. A normal person would lock their door to keep their parents out. Ellie was different. Her mom wouldn't be coming in. Her mom didn't care enough to want to know what she was doing in there.

She examined the pointed fragment of glass with interest, the sharpest point stuck out to her, attracting her to it. She placed it to the frail skin on her arm, slowly digging in as she dragged it across. Her smile widened as the pain increased, tears spilling from her eyes. As she had finished making the cut, she examined it, touching her finger to the blood that leaked from the small wound. Ellie's eyes darted to her elastic bands, the useless things. She ripped them off her wrist, throwing them in the trash can.

The broken girl sat in the corner of her room, trying to decide what she should do next. Exhausted from the day's previous events, she closed her eyes, starting to drift off to sleep.

She jumped, hearing the sound of glass shatter for the third time that day.

"Ellleeannorr…" her mother slurred from the other room. Ellie reached over to snap the elastic bands on her wrist, then remembering she had taken them off. Her eyes darted over to the fragment of glass that had made her feel better. _'Just once more…'_ She shook her head, attempting to tell herself no. Her mind was silently screaming, against her decision.

Giving in, the redhead reached over for the fragment of glass. She dug the edge of the glass into her porcelain skin, the tears spilling from her eyes yet again.

"Just once more," she whispered, to herself, "Just once more…"

_I'm so sick  
Infected with where I live  
Let me live without this  
Empty bliss, selfishness  
I'm so  
I'm so sick  
I'm so  
I'm so sick_

_**I'm So Sick- Flyleaf**_


	5. Concrete Angel

_"Show us what it is, Ellie," Judy Nash told her daughter, a smile on her face, as she held up a camera. It was the girl's tenth birthday, and she had just opened a present from her father. At this time, the girl was happy. Her father hadn't left yet, her mother was sober, she had no problems. Still young and innocent, the redhead had a naïve view of life._

_"It's a guitar!" She exclaimed, looking up at her parents. Her mother smiled nervously, then narrowed her eyes at her husband._

_"Yeah, I thought I could teach you."_

_"Really?" Mrs. Nash asked her husband. "But we already have those drums that you bought Ellie for Christmas." Her voice was strained, a fake smile was plastered upon her face._

_"I thought we could start off on an acoustic guitar," Ellie's father, Greg Nash, answered, sensing the woman's fake enthusiasm. Ellie rolled her eyes._

_"Whatever, just as long as you teach me how to play," Ellie cut in, picking up the small guitar. The man smiled, picking up his own guitar._

_"We'll start off easy, okay?"_

_"Please, Dad. I'm ready for some AC/DC." She replied, smiling. He laughed, ignoring the annoyed look on his wife's face._

_"I'm going to go clean up in the kitchen now," Mrs. Nash said, quickly leaving the room._

_"This is the 'E' string," Greg told Ellie, hitting the string once. Ellie copied, looking up at him for approval. "Good," He replied, smiling. "But try to play extra loud so it annoys your mother."_

_"I heard that!" The woman's voice came from the kitchen. The small girl sniggered, strumming the guitar aimlessly and loudly. She and her father began to laugh, and pretty soon, the woman was laughing too…_

Slowly opening her eyes, Ellie realized she was alone. She checked the clock. It was 6:45, she'd been asleep for an hour. She glanced around the messy room, noticing small drops on blood on the floor. And then she remembered.

She carefully lifted up the sleeves of her long fishnet shirt, examining the two cuts she had made earlier. She ran her fingers over them, still feeling them sting as she lightly touched them. Each of them stood out, the darkest, deepest, most recent cuts on her arm. Each thin red line was a memory, a memory she couldn't forget. These marks wouldn't go away, neither would the memories. Some of them she would remember, some would be mixed up or temporarily forgotten. But they still existed, and so did her cuts.

"Ellleannorr," she heard a slurred voice come from down the hall. "I need you to make dinner." The girl sighed, rolling down her sleeve, leaving the room.

"Mom?" The girl asked, "What do you want for dinner?" Silence. Ellie walked over, realizing her mother had passed out on the old tattered sofa. She sighed again, pulling up the covers over her mother. She retreated back to her room, took exhausted to make any dinner.

She pulled out a math book, tried to concentrate on whatever it said. After several times of almost drifting off to sleep, she gave up, putting the book away. She glanced over at her alarm clock. The bright red numbers read 7:45. The sound of her mother retching up the alcohol she had previously drank echoed down the hall. Ellie sat on the floor, contemplating whether she would be sleeping at home tonight. Making up her mind, she picked up the phone. She didn't know why she was calling him, but the last thing she needed right now was to be alone. Ellie dialed Craig Manning's phone number, waited, listened to it ring.

"Hello?" The voice was cold, harsh sounding.

"H-hi," The girl stuttered, "M-may I please speak to Craig?"

"He's not feeling well, right now."

"Oh oka-" Before she could finish her sentence, the man on the other line hung up.

Not wanting to be alone, the girl decided to stay home tonight. She took a quick shower, then returned to her room, glancing at the phone again. She heard her mother on the phone in the other room, pretending everything was fine, when it was so clearly not.

"Oh, Ellie's doing fine. We're actually bonding for once," the woman explained to her husband who was on the other line. This had made the decision final. Ellie pulled her cell phone from her bag, and quickly dialed Craig's number again.

"Hello?" Craig had answered this time. His voice sounded tired, yet frightened.

"Hi… It's Ellie."

"Oh, hey Ellie…" He replied, sounding more relaxed.

"Are you going to be at the park tonight?" She asked, hoping he'd say yes.

"I- I dunno…" he stuttered, "Why?"

"No reason… I just … don't want to be alone tonight…"

"Okay," he replied, "I'll be there-" She heard yelling in the background, and then he was cut off.

Ellie didn't know what to do. Was he okay? Should she stop by his house and check on him? Should she just wait at the park for him?

Throwing some of her belongings in her black bag, she decided to wait at the park for her friend. Or could she call him a friend? What exactly was he to her? 'Shut up,' she told herself. 'Stop thinking so much…'

The redhead opened the window, jumping out of the one story house, and sprinted down the street to the park. She looked around the dark, deserted area, deciding where she would sleep tonight. Her attention was caught by a large tree, sitting in the middle of the park. The branches and leaves draped down, casting a large shadow around it. She slowly walked over, sat under the tree. Once again, she was curious what time it was. Her cell phone clock read 9:45. Last night he had come around midnight. What time should she expect him tonight? Was he okay? How was she going to wait here alone for the next couple hours? These thoughts plagued her mind, as she sat alone, under the tall, broad tree.

The girl watched as people walked by the park without a second glance at her. She smiled bitterly at how ironic it was how that pretty much summed up her life. No one paid attention to her. Her dad was gone, Marco was now hanging out with more popular people, Ashley had suddenly become Craig's best friend after they worked in some photography club together, her mom… well her mom was a lying alcoholic. Thinking Craig had forgotten about her, she glanced at the cell phone again: 9:59. Craig hadn't shown up yet. What if he didn't show up at all? All Ellie could do was stay there to find out.

She waited.

_Through the wind and the rain  
She stands hard as a stone  
In a world that she can't rise above  
But her dreams give her wings  
And she flies to a place where she's loved  
Concrete angel_

**_Concrete Angel- Martina McBride_**

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**A/n: First of all, thanks for the reviews... Second... I have some ideas for future Degrassi stories in my profile... so... could you guys check the page and tell me which stories you'd like me to write? Or which I should start first?**

**You don't have to... Just... if you have too much free time, much like I do...**


	6. Angel

**A/n: This first portion of the chapter will explain what happened while Craig was on the phone with Ellie in the previous chapter.**

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"…I just… don't want to be alone tonight," Ellie replied shyly.

"Okay," He replied, firmly, as he feared being alone as well. "I'll be there-" Craig was cut off as his father roughly grabbed the phone from his hands.

"Who the fuck were you talking to?" The man snarled, throwing the phone across the room.

"I… It was-"

"It wasn't _Joey_, was it?" Albert asked, sneering as he emphasized the name. Craig frantically shook his head in response.

"N-no. Not Joey-" He started, only to be interrupted again. Albert grabbed his face roughly, glared at him threateningly.

"Then who was it?"

"It was… it was no one…"

"WHO ARE YOU PLANNING TO MEET?" The older man yelled, shoving the younger boy into the wall.

"It- I-" The boy tried desperately to speak up, racking his brain for a lie, just to avoid another beating. Meeting someone… When? Who? … Meeting a friend after school? Yes, that would do it.

But before Craig could say anything, he was backhanded across the face and shoved to the ground. Albert's foot connected with his stomach multiple times.

"P-please… Stop, dad." The older man ignored his pleas. He kicked Craig several more times, bent down to where Craig lay on the floor. Albert observed the cuts, bruises, tears, all without one bit of guilt. Instead, he grabbed the boy roughly by the collar of his shirt.

"Get up," he growled. The boy remained lying still. "Get up!" The man repeated. He watched as the young man slowly lifted himself off the ground. "And quit crying. Only girls cry." Craig quickly tried to wipe them away, but couldn't stop the tears that were still streaming down his cheeks. Sensing this would make his father angry, he tried to walk away, limping past the older man to the door. As he tried to escape the house, Albert grabbed his arm, twisting it behind his back, until a faint snapping sound was heard. His son cried out in agony, more tears flowing from his eyes. He shoved the boy on to the floor once more, stared at him, then left the house.

The boy lay there, wavering in and out of consciousness. He didn't dare move, for the pain was already sufficient as he lay still. After a while, he finally gathered enough strength to slowly lift himself from the blood stained carpet. He limped to his room, checked the time. The bright numbers on the alarm clock read 10:05. Ellie would be waiting for him, wouldn't she?

Turning around to the bright mirror that stood behind him, he examined himself. Angry cuts and bruises decorated his pale face. Dark circles underlined his empty, chocolate eyes that were once gushing with tears. Dried blood was smeared all around his nose and mouth. He slowly removed his bloodstained shirt, careful not to hurt his arm anymore, and examined the rest of the damage. Scrapes and scars were evident all over his stomach. Running his hand over one of the scars, he felt the pain surge through his body. Craig flinched, quickly pulling his hand away. His eyes glanced over at the reflection of his clearly injured arm. The arm was bruised, swollen, and had turned a deep purplish color.

Walking over to the bathroom, he attempted to clean up some of the cuts, and make them not as obvious. When he had finished, he returned to his room, threw a couple of his things in a bag, and quickly left the house before his father returned.

Craig checked his watch as he arrived at the park where he had met Ellie the previous day. It was 10:30. He looked around for her, noticing she was not sitting on the bench she sat at yesterday.

"Craig!" The voice was whispered, yet urgent. He followed the direction of the voice, realizing that Ellie sat in the shadows of a large oak tree. He limped over to her, sat down next to her.

"Hey," he greeted.

"Hey," she replied. And he was grateful that it was dark out because she didn't notice any of the new bruises that decorated his face. They sat in awkward silence, neither knowing what to say. They had hung out together before, but only when Ashley was around. Now they had nothing to talk about.

"So…" He said.

"So…" she repeated. They racked their brains for something to say.

"Ash told me you play the drums…"

"Yeah," Ellie replied, somewhat proud of herself. "I also play guitar. My dad taught me."

"Cool," the dark haired boy replied, "My mom taught me how to play the guitar. What kind do you have?" The red head frowned, recalling the memory, and how happy she was, and how unhappy she was now.

"I started out with acoustic… But now I have a Fender strat." He nodded.

"What kind of music do you like?" It was becoming easier for him to talk to her, and the memories from tonight slowly drifting from his thoughts.

The conversation carried on for a while, but they eventually got tired. Ellie drifted off to sleep soon afterwards, leaving Craig alone with his thoughts. What was he going to do? He could try to sneak back home… No… But if he went home the next day, he would get in serious trouble. Then again, he couldn't leave Ellie alone. What if something happened to her? What if something happened to both of them if they fell asleep? These compulsive thoughts flooded his mind, and he desperately sought for a reasonable decision. He would sleep here tonight, then set his cell phone alarm for 5 am, sneak back into his house, take a shower, then be at school by 7. His dad wouldn't even notice he was gone.

Glancing at his watch, he saw that it was 1 am. He would have to get up early tomorrow in order to run back into his house, shower, and get to school.

"Where were you yesterday?" The man shouted, knocking over anything that was in his way. He advanced on the boy, shoving him to the ground. Taking off his belt, he pulled it behind his back, then struck. The boy cried out as the leather strap left a white mark on his back. The man he refused to call his father pulled back the belt again. The boy cried in pain, begging, wishing for it all to end… Craig stirred around, desperately trying to fall asleep. He couldn't. The boy had never in his life gone to sleep without listening to music. It may have been weird, but it was the only thing that helped him get to sleep. He searched around his bag for an mp3, or CD player, but found none. He sighed, closed his eyes, tried to fall asleep. 

_"Baby, why are you still up?" Julia asked her son, walking into his bedroom. Her eyes were red from crying, a cut remained underneath her right eye. Craig sniffled, pulling the blankets tighter around his small body. A tear escaped the woman's eye, she walked over and sat down next to her son. _

_"Daddy… Daddy hurt you-" The small boy choked out, then began to sob again. 'No,' the woman thought. 'No. He wasn't supposed to see that… He wasn't supposed to know…'_

_"Daddy was just angry, okay? It's alright, though. He apologized," she lied. Noticing the doubtful look on the boy's face, she wrapped her arms around him. "It's okay, baby," she reassured, "It's okay." She rocked him back and forth in her arms, rubbing small circles on his back. As he calmed down, she began to sing,_

_"Spend all your time waiting_

_for that second chance_

_for a break that would make it okay_

_there's always one reason_

_to feel not good enough_

_and it's hard at the end of the day_

_I need some distraction_

_oh beautiful release_

_memory seeps from my veins_

_let me be empty_

_and weightless and maybe_

_I'll find some peace tonight_

_in the arms of an angel_

_fly away from here_

_from this dark cold hotel room_

_and the endlessness that you fear_

_you are pulled from the wreckage_

_of your silent reverie_

_you're in the arms of the angel_

_may you find some comfort there_

_so tired of the straight line_

_and everywhere you turn_

_there's vultures and thieves at your back_

_and the storm keeps on twisting_

_you keep on building the lie_

_that you make up for all that you lack_

_it don't make no difference_

_escaping one last time_

_it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh_

_this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees_

_in the arms of an angel_

_fly away from here_

_from this dark cold hotel room_

_and the endlessness that you fear_

_you are pulled from the wreckage_

_of your silent reverie_

_you're in the arms of the angel_

_may you find some comfort there_

_you're in the arms of the angel_

_may you find some comfort here." _

_As the young woman finished the last verse of the song, she realized her six- year old son was fast asleep in her arms. A small smile spread across her tear stained cheeks._

* * *

**A/n: The song 'Angel' is property of Sarah McLachlan. And I realize the song was written after this point in Craig's life, because Julia died in 98 or 99, I believe, but I used it anyway… So there.**

**Please, if you read this, REVIEW IT. I'm getting like 4 reviews for almost 100 hits! The other show I write for, I get at least 12 reviews per 100 hits. Or more!**

**Also, if you're interested, my friend and I just started a story about the Degrassi kids' future lives, and their kids… That got like two reviews… And like 150 hits, or something. **

**But enough with my ranting. Right now, I know you're a little bit tempted to review and tell me that you liked/disliked this chapter and whatnot, or that I'm a bitch for telling everyone to review, when it's not gonna happen.**


	7. Sound Effects and Overdramatics

Before he knew it, several hours had passed, and it was now five in the morning. Craig slowly sat up, after getting barely any sleep, nudged Ellie lightly.

"Ellie…" he whispered. She blinked, looked around, confused.

"It's still dark outside…"

"I need to go… I'll see you in school."

"Okay…?" She said, as the boy rose from his seat and began to walk away. As he walked, she noticed he was slightly limping.

The boy slowly made his way home in the dark, avoiding eye contact with anyone who was out. As he reached his neighborhood, his eyes searched over the house he refused to call home, trying to decide the best way to get back inside. Window, door, garage, no matter which one he chose, he would have to face the possibility that his dad was awake, waiting for him. It was times like these that made him question his decisions to keep returning home at the end of each long day.

After contemplating his entry for a while, he decided to make his way back up through and through his bedroom window. Although painful, he entered the house successfully. He grabbed a new change of clothes, left his room and went into the bathroom to take a shower.

When he had finished, he walked over to the mirror, examining himself closely, carefully. The cuts, scars, bruises all remained from the previous beatings he'd endured. All were visible crimson colors against his pale skin, although some were faded a bit. They stood out as if screaming, pleading for help. As much as he needed that help, he wouldn't leave his father. After all, he had nowhere to go. No other family besides the bastard. His eyes glanced down at his swollen arm. Slowly, he reached over, touched it carefully, flinching immediately in response.

"Shit…" Craig muttered softly. He glared at his image in the mirror, wishing the scars were invisible. What if they asked him questions? Would he have more lies prepared? What if they found out? What if they sent him away? These questions flooded the boys thoughts as he glanced at the bathroom door. Should he leave or just stay home? It was a lose-lose situation.

"Craigger!" His father's voice called from downstairs. He quickly opened the door, left the room.

"Yeah, dad?" He replied as he entered the kitchen where his father sat.

"Just wanted to let you know that school's starting in half an hour. Are you ready to go?" Craig nodded, turning away from the man.

"I'll… just be going," He stated quietly, and began to walk over to the front door.

"Hey, Craigger?"

"Y-yeah?"

"I know you've been wanting some new dark room equipment… so…" The surgeon began, walking over to the boy. He handed Craig a large wad of cash, avoided eye contact with him.

"Uhh… Thanks, Dad," He replied. He was now used to this. The boy had kept every dollar his father had given him. To him, it wouldn't have felt right to spend it. The money was 'dirty' to him. It was like some sort of twisted job, more than a bribe. Get beaten until you cough up blood and earn twenty dollars. He shook his head, grinning broadly at his father. "Thanks."

"No problem," The man smiled back, "Need a ride to school today?" The boy's fake smile left his face.

"Uhh, no I'll be fine."

"Okay. See you after school. At six." The boy nodded, grabbed his backpack, left the house eagerly.

XxX

"Hey, man," Sean Cameron greeted, walking over to Craig as he was opening his locker.

"Hey," The dark haired boy muttered in response, turning his face away from Sean.

"You sound happy to be here," He remarked sarcastically, smirking a bit.

"No… uh… just tired." He closed his locker, began to walk to his homeroom.

"Yeah, me too," His friend agreed, as he walked along the hallway beside him. "Something wrong, man?" He asked, noticing the fact that Craig hadn't looked up at him all morning.

"No…"

"Are you sure? Cause you-"

"I have to get to homeroom. See you later," He said, and he ran into the MI lab. He quickly passed the other students in the room, avoiding eye contact with all of them. He sat down at a desk in the back, laid his head down on the desk. Today would be easy. Avoid everyone, lie, throw in a couple fake smiles. He was used to it, after all. No one would have to know.

What he was not aware of, however, was that all the students in the room had seen him, noticed the scars, and were now staring at him. Including Ellie.

* * *

**I know, it's kind of short, but I wanted to include the next part in the next chapter... So now it's short...**


	8. Choke Me

**A/n: Sorry I haven't updated in a while! Busy, what with school ruining my life. **

**Thanks for all the reviews last chapter, guys...**

* * *

_"Did you see…"_

"…_Blood…"_

"…_Lots of…"_

"…_Bruises…"_

"…_Happened to him?"_

"_Do you think…?"_

Immediately, there was a chorus of whispers surrounding him. It didn't matter to him, as he couldn't hear them now. The sleep deprived young man had fallen back asleep, and was now in his own little world. A world where none of this mattered; a world where no one would judge him. A world where he was safe. For the time being…

"_Snuck out last night, huh, Craigger?" The man asked, sneering as the boy's nickname left his mouth. _

"_No, sir." Was the reply. He shrank back in fear from the older man, blocking his face from a blow predicted to come._

"_Don't lie to me." Craig felt himself being knocked back harshly into the wall. But he did not cry. Because he deserved it. His father worked hard for him, all day, and Craig never listened, never followed the rules. Albert was obviously concerned over him leaving as his mother had done. Julia was wrong as well. When Albert told you to do something, you were to do it. So he wouldn't complain, wouldn't plead, beg for forgiveness. Because it was only discipline until he learned._

"_Were you out last night?" He was roughly grabbed by his shirt collar, closed his eyes tightly in fear. _

'_Suck it up,' A small voice inside his head ordered. He followed the command because that was what he was learning to do. Be home by six means be home by six. No sneaking out means no sneaking out. The rules should have been ingrained, but they were not. No… Not at first. But he was learning, thanks to his father._

"_Yes, sir." His voice came out small, frightened, childlike, and he tried with much effort to hold back any tears or whimpers that would show his weakness. _

"_Do you remember what I said about you sneaking out?"_

"_Yes, sir."_

"_Then, explain to me, **Craigger**, why you were out last night." Silence. _

"_I asked you a question."_

_"I- I was meeting a friend," He managed to stutter out. _

_"I-I was meeting a friend," Albert mocked the boy's speech impediment which had developed due to the countless beatings he'd endured. He gave Craig a harsh shove backward, into a shelf. Picture frames and other valuable items fell to the floor, shattering to pieces around the young man's shaking form. Still, he remained silent, afraid that making even a small movement would set his father off again. The man delivered several blows to the boy's limp body before stepping back._

_Albert slowly unbuckled his belt, glaring menacingly at his son, almost daring him to move. He pulled the leather strap back, brought it forward with a quick, harsh movement…_

'_You deserve it…'_

'_Don't give in…'_

'_Don't you dare fucking cry…'_

'_Take it like a man…'_

'_He's only doing what's best for you…'_

_He couldn't take it. The voice multiplied, and he now had many surrounding his thoughts, forcing him to think a certain way. The belt seemed to move in slow motion, towards Craig, and he couldn't fight the tears anymore. He couldn't fight back the urge to scream, cry, whimper. He broke…_

"NO!" He cried, his head shooting up from it's position, resting on the desk. All eyes were on him, and he had to come up with something to tell them, whether it be a lie, or some stupid attempt at a joke.

"Craig?" Mr. Simpson asked, concern evident in his tone.

"Dammit… I always lose at this game…" He lied, pretending as though he had just lost a computer game.

"Dude, which one?" Spinner asked, obviously buying it.

"Uhh…"

"You shouldn't be playing computer games in here. But if we're done with that, back to the lesson." Mr. Simpson said, eyeing Craig with suspicion before returning to his lesson. Craig turned back around, embarrassed at his sudden outburst.

'_Take it like a man…'_

'…_Not allowed…'_

'_You know you deserve it…'_

'…_crying, whimpering…'_

'…_discipline…'_

He was distracted from his thoughts when he realized someone had been trying to IM him.

**Ashley: Craig, are you sure you're okay?**

He rolled his eyes. Sometimes Ashley was a bit _too_ concerned for others. He tried to lift his arm to type the reply in, but as he felt a surge of pain shoot through it, he decided not to. He turned around, making eye contact with the brunette and mouthed 'I'm fine.' She frowned, but turned back to her computer. Ellie's worried eyes were upon him as he turned back to his own computer.

'_She's watching you…'_

'…_everyone is…'_

'…_not worried…'_

'…_they don't care…'_

'_You deserve it…'_

'_Take it like a man.'_

The pressure was building up. Between the nightmare; the pain in his arm-hell, his whole body; the constant reminders of why he had earned them; the worried glances from Ellie and Ashley; the cold stares burning into him, telling him he was nothing more than a freak, a failure, a crazy person to them; he began to feel suffocated. The effigy of Albert's firm grip around his frail neck began to feel more and more real.

'…_Punishment, discipline…'_

'_**Craigger…**'_

'…_take it like a man, **Craigger**…'_

And he started to laugh. It started out as a quiet chuckle, but grew louder, as he could feel more and more attention on him. While Ellie's eyes were sympathetic, Ashley's concerned, the majority of the class stared at him as if he was the most disturbing thing they'd ever seen.

The worst part of it was, he had no idea what he was laughing about. It wasn't funny. Not the pain in his arm, nor the limp when he walked, nor the stares upon him, or the nightmare he'd just had. No, there was nothing funny about this. But he didn't care. He never reacted normally to any situation. The thought caused him to laugh harder. Normal… he didn't even know what that was.

'_You'd know if you didn't…'_

'_They're watching you…'_

'_Disobey him so much…'_

'_You're insane…'_

'…_Disciplining you…'_

'_Crazy…'_

'_Simply discipline…'_

'_Nothing funny about this,'_

'_Nothing more…nothing less…'_

'_Psycho…'_

'_Take it like a man.'_

* * *

**A/n: Again, sorry, I haven't updated in so long...**

**Well, now's the best part of the story... Reviewing time!**

**Please, review...**

**Or I'll steal Christmas from you all. insert evil laugh**

**Please, pretty please with TWO cherries on top?**


	9. Worry Rock

Ellie Nash wasn't the nosy type. Despite her interest in journalism, she did not like to get into other people's business. It wasn't her place and she knew that. She understood that. The red head absolutely despised anyone who would ask too many questions, who thought that they needed to know everything, and that by knowing everything they could make everything and everyone better. She just wasn't the nosy type.

Which is why she was surprised by her strong urge to follow Craig on the way out of school. Perhaps it was concern, or that her journalist-instincts were kicking in, but she suddenly had many questions that she wanted to ask him.

"Craig!" She called as the young man walked out of the high school, a slight limp in his step.

"Yeah?" He replied, startling the girl when he turned around. She quickly sped up, so that he wouldn't have to wait too long for her to catch up. When she reached the dark haired boy, they began to walk together.

"Well…" She started, suddenly unsure of what to say. "I…uh… You walked me home yesterday…"

"Yeah?"

"I guess… I'm returning the favor?" She said hesitantly, biting her lip as she stared up at him.

"Oh…" His face fell, and suddenly she began to feel self-conscious. Did this have something to with why he left her so early this morning?

"Umm… never mind… Forget it…" The redhead mumbled, blushing. She started to walk away, pretending it didn't matter, although she desperately needed the company.

"No…Uh…" He started, and she stopped. "Why go home?"

"I said forget it, not recite some old Pearl Jam lyric."

"No… I mean… why go home? We could hang out at the Dot or something…"

"Oh. Okay." She smiled, relaxing a little, turning back around.

"You like Pearl Jam?" Craig asked, flashing the redhead a grin.

"Yeah, they're one of my favorite bands," She replied, as the two of them began to walk in the direction of the Dot.

"Yeah, mine too…" Ellie's smile faltered as she noticed the limp in his step again, remembering what had happened earlier that day. She slowed her pace down, making sure she didn't get ahead of Craig, but said nothing. Despite her concern and those journalist-instincts, she kept her questions to herself, as she would want the same treatment from others. Sometimes it was best if things went unsaid; questions went unanswered. She didn't need to know everything.

"Stop." The words came out harshly, making Ellie jump as they disrupted her thoughts.

"What?"

"Sorry…Never mind."

"I-"

"It's fine, forget it." He said, the words coming out rushed, slightly frustrated.

"Um… okay?"

The two walked in an uncomfortable silence, each lost in their own thoughts. If it had not been for Craig finally noticing where they were and disrupting her from her thoughts to announce that they were at the restaurant, Ellie was sure they would have passed it. They walked in together over to a booth in the back corner. As they were sitting down on opposite sides of the booth, Ellie noted that the young man's breathing was labored and he squeezed his eyes closed for a moment; a painful expression briefly displayed upon his bruised and battered face. Pretending she didn't notice, not only for her own reasons, but his as well, she tried to start a conversation.

"So…" Ellie began, realizing they were stuck in another awkward silence.

"Uh… Ash said you play the drums too." The redhead nodded, blushing slightly.

"Yeah…"

"Well don't hog the conversation over there," he joked, and she grinned in response.

"Sorry. I don't really talk that much…"

"Then what are you going to do when the waiter comes over? Mime it out to him?"

"How do you mime out food?" She asked, an amused look on her face.

"I don't know… you're the mute one."

"I am capable of speaking."

"Then why is your side of the conversation usually composed of 'uh', 'yeah', 'no', and the infamous 'whatev'?"

"I don't say 'whatev' that much!" She cried defensively.

"Yeah you do," he teased.

"Well not as much as Spinner says 'dude'."

"True…But it's cool… no one else says it. It's your own word." She smiled, blushing at his comment, then criticizing herself for doing so. Why was she blushing at a compliment from Craig?

"Hey Craig. Vampira," Spinner said, nodding at Ellie as he walked over to them. Knowing he was one of Craig's friends, she resisted the urge to make fun of him, his work uniform, and every other quality he possessed that was worthy of making fun of, and kept her mouth shut.

"What can I get for you guys?" Craig looked at Ellie.

"What do you want?"

"I dunno… I'm not really hungry…"

"Fries then?"

"Sure."

"Dude, what is she, your girlfriend now or something? What happened to the other goth girl?"

"Spin, shut up and go get our food."

"Fine…" He started to walk away, "Did you win that computer game yet?" He asked, referring to the events of that morning. Ellie stared at Craig. He frowned for a moment, but as quickly as it came, it vanished. He gave what Ellie knew to be a fake smile, and replied, "No, Spin… not yet."

"Me either…" He said, shaking his head as he walked away.

"So…" Ellie started.

"This is the third time we've done that."

"It amuses me that you counted."

"I could have said it was the fifteenth. I don't like to exaggerate things."

"Neither do I."

"Earlier, you said you like Pearl Jam… What other bands do you like?"

"I dunno… Mostly rock music…Pink Floyd, Green Day, The Ramones, Lifehouse, Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, Nirvana, AC/DC, Black Sabbath, Oasis, Velvet Revolver, U2, Temple of the Dog, Jimi Hendrix, Incubus, Cream, David Bowie…" She listed, randomly, and he smiled at her.

"Good taste in music. Not many people have heard of Temple of the Dog."

"True… and sad."

"Three words this time, Ellie." He teased.

"Shut up." She said, laughing a bit. It was silent for a moment before she looked back up at him. "You know, most of my friends call me El…"

"Am I included in that?"

"Depends… Are you going to keep making fun of me?"

"Only when it's necessary."

"It's not necessary. And neither is your friendship," She joked.

"Ouch." He paused for a moment, looking down at his watch. His eyes widened in horror, and he jumped up from the table.

"Craig?"

"Sorry… sorry… I have to go… I'm going to be late…" Craig apologized quickly, gathering his things, rushing out of the restaurant fast as he could. Ellie quickly followed him.

"Craig!"

"I need to go." His walking was fast paced, and it would have turned into a sprint if it had not been for the limp in his step.

"Craig, wait!" She called, but he didn't hear her. The redhead stood outside the Dot, slightly angry, and completely confused on what had just happened. Sighing, she went back into the restaurant, grabbed her things, and left. It began to drizzle, and she sighed again. _'Just my luck.'_

She looked down at her watch and saw that it was 5:15… She had been hanging out with Craig longer than she thought. A huge wave of guilt washed over her and she realized that her mother was probably wondering where she was. Not, of course, worried. She was probably just wondering why no one was there to clean up after her and cook her dinner.

Ellie was fourteen years old. It was not her responsibility to do every single house chore. It was not her responsibility to cook for her mother or bring her home food. It was not her responsibility to worry over her mother. But she did all of those things because she felt that she had to. And she suddenly wondered about Craig. Perhaps he was going through the same things. Maybe that was why he left the restaurant so early… She pondered this, on her long walk home.

"Eleanor…" Her mother slurred from the tattered old sofa, as the redhead stepped in the door.

"Sorry mom… I was out with a friend… Lost track of time…" She spoke, but didn't really expect anyone to be listening.

"Your father called earlier…"

"Fuck…" She muttered. It seemed that whenever he called, Ellie wasn't around. And her mother was. Just another way for the woman to be able to pull off the huge lie she was living.

_"How's Ellie?"_

_"Eleanor is fine."_

_"Are you guys getting along?"_

_"Of course we are. It's like we're best friends!"_

_"Are you taking good care of her?"_

_"Of course I am, dear."_

The voices were sickeningly sweet, even in her head, so much that she felt the sudden urge to vomit. Instead, she faked a smile, turned towards her mother.

"Guess I'll have to catch him next time…" Sure… If her mom didn't get there first. Ellie sighed for what seemed like the thousandth time that day, and picked up a whiskey bottle and two shot glasses, which lay on the stained carpet. She walked into the kitchen, emptying the shot glasses, throwing the whiskey bottle away. In a way, it was her daily routine. Come home, pick up drinks, throw them away, clean out the glasses, clean up the carpet, make her mom dinner. She compared this with a normal teenager's routine, which mainly consisted of hanging out with friends and doing homework.

The girl sighed yet again, snapping her rubberbands at the sound of a loud crash, followed by a small groan. Ellie glanced at her arm once more before leaving the kitchen.

She was fourteen years old. Cleaning up alcoholic beverages should not have been part of her daily routine. Caring for a drunken woman should not have been one of her top priorities.

* * *

**A/N: I know Spinner was still in his 'uber-gross-hairnet-lunch lady-phase' in season two, but I'm making him work at the Dot. Know why? Know why? Cause it's MY story!**

**Anywho, thanks for the reviews last chapter!**


	10. Empty Eyes

_I sit, watching nothing On the TV set  
Starting to forget  
Promises you've said_

_You stare at TV reruns  
And when I speak do you listen?_

_Can you see me?  
Feel me breathing?  
I'm dying inside  
I'm to late to fade  
I'm trapped inside  
Your never ending empty eyes_

_I lay  
On the bed's cold side  
Can you hear me cry?  
Or are you occupied?_

_I wonder how it started  
How we became, so cold hearted_

_Can you see me?  
Feel me breathing?  
I'm dying inside  
I'm to late to fade  
I'm trapped inside  
Your never ending empty eyes_

_Empty Eyes- Cassie Steele_

It's funny how staring at one insignificant thing can bring back some of the happiest memories you've had. It's also quite funny that no matter how happy the memories were, and how desperately you wanted to relive them, even thinking about them made you sick to your stomach. That's exactly how Ellie felt as she stood over the stove, preparing dinner for her mother.

"Mom, it's ready," She announced quietly, although still receiving a groan from her mother in the other room. Aside from the casual groan, the house was completely silent, in almost an eerie way. And it saddened her deeply, as she once remembered a house full of joy and laughter. That was a long time ago, though.

Staring down at the plate of spaghetti she had prepared for her mother, she felt her thoughts drifting off as she once remembered a happier time.

_"Ellie, eat your dinner," Her mother ordered, frowning slightly as she pointed at the plate of spaghetti in front of her daughter. Annoyed by the incessant scraping of a fork and knife against a plate, she watched her daughter play with the food as if it was foreign._

_"No…"_

_"Why not?"_

_"Because… It's gross…" Judy smirked at the simple response._

_"He tried, Ellie."_

_"I like it when you make dinner better," The five-year old replied grumpily, poking a large, deformed meatball with her fork._

_"Me too," the woman mumbled, staring at the unidentified meal that her husband had prepared._

_"Hey guys, I made more if anyone wants it," Greg announced cheerfully, holding out a large platter of the so-called spaghetti. _

_"No thanks, dear," His wife replied, faking a smile, "We're fine."_

_"Daddy, this is gross," Ellie announced bluntly, taking her eyes off of the meal._

_"What's wrong with it, El?" _

_"It's gross. This isn't how mommy makes it. And this meatball looks like dog poop." The man laughed, following Ellie's gaze at the full plate._

_"Critiqued by a five-year old, Greg," Judy said with a laugh._

_"I'm sure it's fine," Her husband spoke, uneasily, staring at the plate. He took a forkful of the food, putting it into his mouth._

_"You don't like it either," The child commented, noticing the disgusted look on her father's face. "I'm making dinner." Anxiously, the five-year old walked over to the cabinet, pulling out a box of cookies._

_"Ellie, you know we can't have cookies for dinner," Judy stated firmly._

_"At least it's food," Ellie replied, picking up a small chocolate chip cookie. Her parents laughed, reaching for the box of cookies as well._

"Eleanor…" The girl jumped, startled as she was ripped from the memory. Her dad had eventually become better at making the dish, until it had become her favorite dinner. Whenever he came home, she would ask him to make spaghetti for dinner. She picked up the plate, walking into the living room, gently placing it on the table in front of her mother. When she heard a small 'thanks', the redhead turned her back, starting back for the kitchen.

"Where are you going? Why don't you sit down?" Reluctantly, the girl complied, sitting on a chair across the room from her mother.

"So how was school today?" The question, which hadn't been asked in at least three years, caught her off guard.

"Eleanor?"

"Fine, mom." She picked at the plate of spaghetti, as if it was the food she'd once hated as a child. The only sound that filled the room was the scraping of silverware against plates. Her mother had run out of things to say to her. 'Big surprise there,' Ellie thought bitterly. 'She doesn't know one damned thing about me anymore.' Watching her mother reach for a bottle of whiskey placed on the table, she decided she could no longer stay in the room. Receiving a questioning glance from her mother, she explained her actions.

"Just… cleaning off the plates…" After taking the dishes into the kitchen, she reluctantly returned, sitting once again, across the room from her mother.

"What did you do today?" Hoping her mother would actually listen, she began to tell her about her day.

"…And after school, Craig and I went over to the Dot and got some-" Her voice trailed off, realizing that the woman was no longer listening. Judy let out a low moan, lying back down on the sofa. Ellie sighed, picked up the half-empty bottle of whiskey. As she reached for it, her sleeve rose a bit farther than she'd intended, revealing one of yesterday's lacerations. The redhead bit her lip, remembering that her mother was staring at her. She slowly looked up, expecting a look of worry, confusion, or anger.

Instead, she faced the vacant stare of the woman she'd expect to be concerned about her. The dull eyes bore into her, almost staring through her as if she wasn't even there. The intoxicated woman paid no attention to the cut on her arm, nor the hurt expression on her daughter's face. At that moment, Ellie decided that it wouldn't matter if she had come home tonight. The only thing she was good for in this house was making her mother dinner and cleaning up the broken shards of clumsily dropped shot glasses.

_'No one cares, Ellie, El," A small voice in the back of her head spoke, tauntingly. She could almost see a sneer across the face of it's source._

_'If you were to disappear off the face of the Earth, a total of two people, maybe three, would be affected by it. Sure, your mom might care, maybe for a second… But then she'd drink her problems away like she always does. And you'd be forgotten, much like you are right now.'_

The redhead, hazel eyes glassy, rose from the floor and retreated to her room. She anxiously opened a CD case, pouring it's contents onto the carpet. Razor blades, compasses, scissors, shards of glass decorated the floor, the glint of each tempting her. Ellie reached for the shard of glass, pressing it against the porcelain skin of her arm. She slid the glass across, finding solace in the self-inflicted wound. A sigh of relief escaped the bright red lips that had been bitten down on too many times. 'People… people would care if I died… right? Ashley…Marco…Dad…Craig…'

_'Marco doesn't like you. Your dad left you. Craig barely even knows you. It'd be quite easy to get over your death. Ashley has other friends, you know. You were just the replacement. The only friends you have are razor blades, pocket knives, and the shards of glass from your pathetic drunk mother dropping bottles of alcohol on the kitchen floor."_

She shook her head, pretending the voice was not audible to her. Just then, a small sound came from the other side of the room, which she recognized as her cell phone. Picking it up, she realized that Craig was the one calling her.

"Hello?" And silence was her response.

"Craig?" Still no response.

"Craig? Are you there?" On the other line, a faint 'Later' could be heard from the young man before the phone went dead. Understanding the word as a promise that he would be at the park later, the redhead nodded, began to gather her stuff for later.

After finishing up some of her homework, then taking a brief shower, she checked the clock, realizing it was 9:45. The redhead grabbed her bag, walked out into the living room. She glanced back at her mother once more, before leaving the house.

In almost any other family, the mother would be concerned that her daughter was leaving the house at 10pm. In Ellie Nash's house, she could stumble in at one in the morning, smelling of alcohol or cigarettes, or come home bruised and battered from a fight, and it wouldn't matter. Her mother would be staring blankly at the wall, passed out, or in the bathroom, emptying the contents of her stomach, and Ellie's presence would go unnoticed.

The petite redhead wrapped her leather jacket tightly around herself, feeling the effects of the harsh November winds. Several people stared at her as she walked along the streets. While their glances at her may have been of concern or worry, all she could see was the blank stare she had often received from her mother and it sent a shiver down her spine.

She turned, walking into the vacant park where she usually spent her nights. In the darkness, the shadow of a young man sitting on a park bench was barely visible to her.

"It's about time you showed up, Nash."

* * *

**A/n: If there are any errors, I'm sorry... I tried to look over it as best as I could, but I felt like crap while writing this... But I really wanted to write something...**

**Thanks for the reviews last chapter.**


	11. Liar, Liar

"Guess I wanted to make _you_ wait this time," The redhead said, grinning as she took a seat beside Craig on the park bench. It creaked slightly as she sat down, sat down with the boy, his occasional shallow breaths cutting through the thick silence between them.

"Guess so," he replied, and through the darkness, she could hear the smile in his voice. She smiled too. He had that effect on people.

In a way, he was becoming her reason to smile. He was the light, shining through the darkness, helping her find her smile when she thought she'd lost it. He was her security blanket, keeping her sane, happy.

"So, how many 'whatevs' am I in for tonight, Miss Nash?" She laughed. A laugh she'd only hear from herself when she was around Craig.

Weeks went by, each dealing with their own problems, each looking forward to one thing every day. Every night, they would meet at the park, the same park bench, the same pointless conversations. Neither asked the other why they were sleeping on a park bench in the middle of the night while it was nearly Winter. Neither told the other why they would come to the same place every night.

Ellie never questioned why Craig had to leave at five in the morning. Craig never questioned why Ellie didn't bother to check in with her family when she woke up in the morning. It didn't much matter to the other, as long as they met were able to see each other every night.

However, Ellie's curiosity rose on one particular night where the raven-haired boy had arrived looking worse than usual. His mouth and nose bled severely, his limping was worse, his breaths more ragged, his voice rasped as he spoke. The redhead said nothing, pretending it was no more serious than the usual injuries, which decorated the boy's body. She fell asleep next to him as she did every night. She walked home with him- although at a much slower pace- as she did every day.

The redhead made her way through the front door of her house, said hello to her mother without expecting a response. The redhead cooked dinner, spoke less than ten words to her mother for the whole day. She did her homework, prepared to leave the house. This was her routine. She had grown accustomed to doing these same things every day.

However, when she reached the park, Craig was not there. This was not out of the ordinary, as he often came late. She waited; 10:30, no Craig. Ten forty-five, eleven, twelve, still no Craig. As she was about to fall asleep, she heard someone approaching. Ellie recognized the figure as Craig, but said nothing about his especially late arrival.

The next morning, she woke up alone as she usually did and made her way to school. Entering Mr. Simpson's class, she realized that Craig had not arrived yet. The redhead spotted an empty seat on the far side of the room next to Ashley and took her seat.

"Hey, El," Ashley greeted, her eyes not leaving the glowing screen.

"Hey," Ellie replied quietly, her gaze kept on the floor as she retrieved a notebook and pen from her black messenger bag. "Ash… do you know where Craig is?"

"Actually no," The brunette replied, frowning slightly. "I'm kind of worried though… He keeps coming in here looking worse than yesterday. He won't tell me what's wrong, though… Just keeps saying he got into a fight."

"Yeah…that's what he told me," Ellie lied, hoping to end the conversation.

"If that's true, he seems to be getting into a fight every day," Ashley continued, frowning.

"Yeah," Ellie agreed. _"A fight… right." _

"Alright, if you all would stop talking, I would like to begin today's lesson."

The class fell silent as they began to watch Mr. Simpson while he gave a demonstration on the lesson. While all of the other students may have been paying attention… or in Spinner's case thinking of other things he could be doing right now, Ellie's thoughts were somewhere else.

_"He's probably fine…" she told herself optimistically. _

_"Maybe he was the victim of a hit and run while he was running home this morning," the pessimistic side of her thought._

_"No, he's careful."_

_"Have you seen him lately?"_

_"I'm sure he made it home. He's probably just sick."_

_"Or in another 'fight'."_

_"N-no… He'll be fine. I'll see him tomorrow."_

_"No, maybe the day after. At his funeral. Or maybe at the hospital."_

_"He's fine!"_

"Ellie?" Mr. Simpson asked, breaking her train of thoughts.

"Huh? What?"

"I asked you a question," the teacher clarified.

"Oh… sorry… what?" She asked, then receiving a concerned look from Mr. Simpson.

"I said…"

_"This is why you shouldn't get close to people, Ellie. You got close to your parents, one of them left you, the other wouldn't notice you if you pulled up your sleeve and shoved your arm in her face. You got close to Marco and that failed miserably. You got close to Craig, and now…"_

_"Craig is fine. I'll see him tonight like I always do."_

"Ellie?!"

Hours later, the redhead sat in the cafeteria, waiting for Ashley to join her. She hadn't been able to concentrate all day, as she was spending most of the day assuming the worst about Craig, arguing with herself about whether he was okay or not. Perhaps if she weren't such a negative person, she wouldn't be thinking that something awful happened to her friend.

Looking up from her pathetic excuse for a lunch, she saw her brunette friend entering the cafeteria. She waved her hand slightly to get Ashley's attention, and saw the girl heading in her direction. Her slight smile slowly disappeared as she saw the look on the brunette's face as she came closer to the cluttered cafeteria table.

"Ash… what's up?" Ellie asked. After hearing the next statement, the redhead's expression mirrored that of the concerned frown that Ashley wore.

"El, it's Craig… He's in the hospital."

* * *

**It's been months since my last update... SORRY!  
I'm not going to forget about this fic, but my next update probably won't be very soon because my school is trying to kill me with an overload of work and pointless research papers.**

**I don't really like this chapter, so I might go back and fix it later... but I wanted to put something up...**

**So... anyway... now you can review it...  
If you haven't ignored the author's note and already reviewed it.**


	12. The Leaving Song

_"Open your eyes." The soft, soothing voice spoke, tearing Craig from his nightmare. He blinked rapidly, trying to get accustomed to the sudden bright lighting of the room. His eyes searched the room for the source of the voice. Where was he?_

_Surely he wasn't at his home…was he still at the park with Ellie? What time was it? His eyes widened and he frantically tried to rise from where he lay on the…bed? Where was he?! The room was colorless, soundless. Was he dead?_

_No… he could hear… The faint sounds of crying down the hall, screaming, moaning, a faint beeping noise. How did he get here? He needed to get home immediately._

_"You're safe here." The voice said. A voice he had heard before._

_"…Mom…" he breathed, turning to see the angelic woman who sat on the windowsill beside his bed. "Mom… how did I get here? Am I…?" She remained silent, a lone tear slipping down her soft cheek._

_"Mom?" He asked, as the raven-haired woman lightly caressed his bruised cheek._

_"I'm sorry." She said, her voice sounding farther away._

_"Wh-" Her loving eyes turned to the cold familiar eyes of his father. Her light, beautiful figure morphed into a masculine, muscular form. The woman's loving smile became the cold scowl, which his father constantly wore on his thin, tight lips. The hand that not even two minutes ago had been stroking his cheek lovingly pulled away in disgust, then struck him violently across his face._

_"Get up, Craigger!"_

_"I-"_

_"I said wake up!" When the boy pulled away in fear, he was struck again by his father._

_"WAKE UP!"_

"Craig, buddy, wake up." The boy jolted awake, greeted by the blurred silhouette of his stepfather.

"I'll get up… I'm getting up. Sorry. Sorry-" He murmured frantically, flinching as the man rested a hand on his thin, weakened shoulder, the terrifying images of his father replaying in his mind.

"Hey… Craig, relax-"

"No… I can't… I can't be here. I need to go-"

"You need to calm down." Joey stated firmly, gripping Craig's arms to prevent him from causing any harm to himself.

"No, you don't understand. I can't-"

"Craig." This time it was spoken in a firm, commanding tone, and the younger man froze where he was. After a silent moment, he took a deep breath.

"What happened?"

"Well…" Joey started with uncertainty. He looked to the floor, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to make a decision.

"Joey…" Craig repeated quietly, "What happened?"

"That's really something I should be asking you…" He paused, looking back up at Craig, concern apparent in his warm brown eyes. "You were on your way to school this morning, passing by my house on the way. You were in really bad shape, Craig. So I stopped you to ask what had happened. Before I knew it, you just collapsed on the sidewalk in front of my house."

"Did you…um… you didn't call my dad, did you?"

"He works here, Craig. Of course I told him. Why?" Craig's eyes widened in horror, darting over to the open door where doctors and nurses frequently passed by outside of the room.

"O-oh… uhh… no reason…" He shrank away under the pressure of Joey's skeptical eyes.

"Do you want me to get him for yo-?"

"No," Craig replied immediately. The older man frowned slightly, raising an eyebrow at his all too hurried response.

"Craig…"

"What?"

"Maybe it's just me, but when someone walks by my house severely beaten and wakes up frantic without a memory of what had happened in the past hours, I tend to get concerned. What happened?"

"I…uh… I got in a fight…"

"With who?"

"Uh… this guy… from the park…"

"What were you doing at the park last night?!"

"I…"

"Craigger. You're awake," the all-too familiar voice came from the doorway, chilling him to the bone. He slowly turned to face his father.

"Uh… yeah," Craig replied, faking a smile.

"Did he tell you what happened?" Albert asked feigning ignorance.

"Yeah. He said he got in a fight with some guy from the park…?" Joey replied, his eyes shifting between the father and son.

"What were you doing in the park, Craig?" His father asked, still pretending he had no idea what had happened. Here he was, lying in the hospital because of something his father did to him. And here, his father stood, showing no signs of guilt whatsoever, asking Joey what had happened to protect himself.

"Craig?" Albert repeated, his voice making the young man sick to his stomach.

"I… well… I…" His father's eyes were focused on him, burning holes through his skin, strangling him, pressuring him to think of another lie.

"What were you doing in the park?" The question was asked again, his father's voice firm, becoming irate.

"My friend…and…I…couldn't…" He had lied so many times in his life, so why was he having such a hard time with it now? Craig could usually spit out lies like it was no big deal. He had mastered being a liar, and now he couldn't even come up with one simple fib.

"Craig, you haven't answered the question."

_'You want me to tell you how I got hurt? I got hurt at **home**, not at the park. I got hurt because I didn't come home at the right time, or I failed a test. I got hurt because I went to stay with Ellie when I was too scared to face **you**. I got hurt because you can't control your fucking temper, dad. Joey, you might be interested in this. He's an abusive bastard, and he did this to your late wife, too. So don't get mad at me because I can't think of a story fast enough, **dad**, because I wouldn't have to if you hadn't beaten the shit out of me in the first place.'_

The words were on the tip of his tongue, word vomit, ready to spew out of his mouth.

"I… um… I don't really want to talk about it now," Craig explained quietly, eyeing his father for approval. The older man nodded slightly, the corners of his lips curving to form a frown. A feeling in the pit of his stomach told Craig that he would be paying for this later.

"Maybe you can tell me about it later?" Joey asked, a concerned expression upon his face.

"Yeah… uh… maybe later…" His stepfather nodded and exited the room, leaving the boy alone with his father. Making sure the younger man had left, Albert advanced on his son in a matter of seconds, gripping him tightly by the shoulders.

"You'd better come up with something," he threatened, shaking the boy roughly, then releasing his son's shoulders. "And it better be believable. Understood?" Craig nodded solemnly, and with that, his father exited the room.

The dark-haired boy visibly relaxed at the absence of his father in the room. He exhaled loudly, closing his eyes as he lay his head down on the hospital bed's soft pillow. Hearing footsteps approach the room, he tensed, but pretended he was still asleep.

"I know, but I'm really worried about him…" Craig relaxed again, recognizing the voice. Ashley.

"The doctor said it was nothing too bad." The other voice said, attempting to reassure the girl. Ellie. Still pretending to be asleep as he had no energy to explain any of this to Ashley, he had to fight the urge to smile at the sound of the redhead's voice.

"He's asleep," Ashley noted quietly, "Should we wait?"

"I guess…" Ellie replied.

"I'm going to go look for something in the gift shop downstairs." He heard the footsteps of his friend become softer as she exited his room and walked down the hallway to find the elevator. Maybe he could open his eyes now. Ellie wouldn't ask too many questions.

"You can stop pretending you're asleep now," Ellie said, and he heard the smile in her voice as she spoke. Gradually opening one eye, he smiled as well.

"Sorry… wanted to avoid too many questions."

"Yeah, they're kind of inevitable. What gives?" His smile quickly dissolved at the question.

'You'd better come up with something. And it better be believable. Understood?'

"You don't want to tell me…"

"It's not you, El… It's…I just…" Craig trailed off as his father's intimidating figure passed by in the hallway. He could already feel the immobilizing pain of having his rib cage kicked repeatedly, the stinging of his busted lip, a cry nearly escaped his lips at the thought of having his arm broken. He could already smell the sour stench of the blood that soaked his clothes, dried up on his light skin. The coppery taste of the crimson liquid as it flowed from his nose, spewed from his mouth when he let out a dry cough.

_'I'm sorry, baby.'_

_'I SAID GET UP!'_

'I can't do it…' The boy thought hopelessly. He knew that somehow, some part of his father loved him. It was becoming harder and harder to tell, but his father did love him. He couldn't take it anymore. Craig couldn't go through the day without being hit, verbally abused, even thinking about the abuse to come. Albert was in his nightmares, and if it was a pleasant dream, Albert's presence could turn it into a nightmare in the blink of an eye. He couldn't live like this anymore.

Slowly rising from the bed, he reached for his clothes which lay scattered on the floor beside the bed.

"Craig, what are you doing?" His movements were becoming faster, frantic. He entered the bathroom, and was out in less than a minute, fully dressed.

"Craig…?"

"I'm leaving. I can't stay here."

"You can't leave," she told him, following his movements around the room.

"I have to. I'm sorry, El." Craig gave her a brief hug before limping over to the doorway. He had no idea where he was going, but the thought of finally being free was enough to motivate him to escape.

"Craig, wait…" Although desperately wanting to leave, he turned back to the girl. Her eyes were kept at the floor, her fingers constantly snapping the rubber bands that she always wore on her wrists. Ellie's eyes shifted nervously to meet Craig's.

"I'm coming with you."


	13. Take Me Away

"No." he said, his voice harsh, tone icy. She flinched, the snapping of the elastic band following his response. He started to turn back around, but froze at the sound of the girl's response.

"Why the hell not?" She asked, suddenly angry with him. Craig was silent for a moment, then spoke.

"I can't let you."

"Craig-"

"El, you can't just live on the streets. If something happened to you-"

"If something happened to me? _I _am not supposed to be in a hospital bed right now. And if you're implying that just because I'm a girl-"

"Ellie, listen to me." He paused. "If something happened to you-not that I'm saying that nothing could happen to me out there-I would never be able to forgive myself. You have a life here. You have school, your friends…"

"And you don't?"

"Look… I wish I could explain it, but I have to go now." He turn around, deciding to leave at that moment. Ellie reached out, touched his arm lightly.

"Craig, please." He stared into her wide, pleading eyes, closing his own as he took a deep breath. "Don't leave me," she whispered, her hazel eyes filling up with tears. "I need you."

"Ellie, I-" He watched as she pulled her arm away, snapping the elastic bands with a sudden harshness; her movements compulsive, frantic.

Hesitantly, Craig reached both hands out, gently pulling her hand away from her arm. Her eyes, glazed over with unshed tears, met with his own, and he allowed his hands to meet hers. Sliding his fingers between the redhead's, he noticed her eyes fill with hope.

As footsteps were heard nearing the room, his grip on her hands tightened, his body tensed. Craig's compassionate expression immediately changed to one of fear. The girl's eyes remained steady on his.

"Let's go," she whispered, letting go of one hand. He nodded, quickly following her out of the room. The two made their way out of the hospital quickly, silently.

"We need to stop at my house first," Craig informed her, avoiding her eyes.

"I need to go to mine too."

"Okay, we can go to yours first," He offered, glancing briefly at her for confirmation.

"N-no… I'll get my stuff… Meet me in the park in an hour?" He nodded, parting ways with the redhead. Running back to his house, the only thing he could picture was the tears in the girl's eyes.

_"I need you."_ He could hear her voice in his mind, the words chilling him to the bone. She had sounded so sad, so desperate. He was glad, though, that she had told him that; made him bring her along.

Because he needed her just the same. As much as Craig wanted to leave, he wasn't sure that he would be able to survive without Ellie's company. He had grown so accustomed to spending time with her that he didn't think he could last a day without seeing her anymore. She was the reason for his smile, the reason for his laughter. While he had wanted several times to give up, he stayed. For her: for her company, for her smile, her laughter, those big, bright hazel eyes.

When the haunting thoughts of his father crept inside his mind, all he had to do was picture her face or the soft sound of her voice, and everything else seemed to dissolve.

Reaching his house, he hesitantly stepped in, having to remind himself that his father was still at work. Craig rushed up the stairs, into his room and began gathering the things that meant the most to him: camera, scrapbook, cd player, pictures, other items that he would need. His eyes rested on the pile of money that he had received from his father and his hand hovered over it hesitantly. Maybe he'd burn it or give it away to a charity or something. The money was dirty; a reward for constantly being afraid of his own father, accepting the beatings each night as though he deserved them. Maybe he did. Either way, Craig wanted to leave.

Piling the last of his favored belongings in a bag, he grabbed the unwanted money and stuffed it into the pocket of his leather jacket.

"Craigger!"

The boy froze at the words, almost dropping the duffel bag held loosely in his hand.

"Craig, I know you're in here." Yanking open the window, he threw his duffel out onto the dying grass below and jumped out after it, carrying both his guitar and camera, careful not to break either of the items.

"CRAIG!" Sweat pouring down his face, eyes wide in fear, the boy darted from the yard, wanting to leave as soon as possible and never look back.

_"Craig, when I tell you to do something, YOU DO IT!" The man yelled, striking his son across the face._

Though it was nothing but a memory, he could feel the bruise starting to form where he had been hit. His father's booming voice echoed in his mind, drowning out every other thought that passed through his mind.

_"Craig, you can't go with your mother. You can't leave me, Craig, I love you."_

Craig stopped in his tracks, almost deciding to turn around upon hearing his father's plea. All Albert had wanted was for him to stay; to listen to him; to obey him. Was it really his father's fault if Craig failed to do what he was asked?

_"Take it like a man, Craigger."_ His father's voice interrupted, yet again, and a wave of fear washed over him.

"Craig." He jumped back in alarm before realizing who it was.

"Ellie," he breathed, sighing in relief.

"Are you okay?" She asked, concern evident in her eyes.

"Yeah, fine," Craig replied almost immediately, his breaths shallow, tone uneven.

"Come on," Ellie said grasping his arm gently, "Let's get out of here."

"Yeah," he whispered, nodding, "Yeah." As she began to lead him out of the park, he stopped once more. "El… can we uh… stop somewhere before we leave?"

_Pure and weak, I suffer when I dream  
Cleansed of me, I suffer when I dream  
Because I want you to stay, you take away the pain  
I want you to stay, I need you here to keep me sane_

_**Take Me Away- Seether**_

* * *

****Sorry for the lack of updates...

Again.

School's over in a week, so hopefully my updates will become more frequent... After finals, that is.


	14. November Rain

She had been half expecting for him to stop at Ashley's or Joey's to see Angela one more time. Which is why the redhead was surprised to find herself being led into a cemetery.

"Craig…" she began, but stopped herself, suddenly feeling like an intruder when he knelt next a half-decade old headstone, decorated with freshly laid golden pansies. Comprehension flooded over her as she read the name inscribed on the grave: Julia Jeremiah.

"It seems stupid, but I wanted to apologize to her before I leave," he explained quietly, the only sound in the deserted cemetery.

"It's not stupid," Ellie assured him, kneeling down next to the dark haired boy.

"I wish she could have met you. She would have liked you." Ellie said nothing, silently doubting that any mother would love the fact that her son was running away with a psycho girl. A wave of guilt washed over her. What would her own mother think of her running away? The guilt was soon replaced with anger. Her mother wouldn't notice at all. Or would she? The absence of her daughter meant that there was no one there to cook for her, no one to clean up after her, nor to tidy up the house, cleanse the smell of alcohol from the carpet.

Her expression was somewhat empathetic as she observed the appearance of Craig's face, trying to remember what it was like to have a mom. She wondered if she could remember what it was like to have a mom. There was a huge difference between having a mom and having a mother. Over the passage of time, Judy Nash had become a mother.

"She was so perfect… I guess that's why I love Angie so much. I can see my mom when I look at her." He looked over at the redhead, who smiled in return and rested her hand on his shoulder. "Sometimes I just wish I could…" he stopped, drew in a shaky breath. The girl waited patiently at his side for him to continue, but he remained silent.

He cleared his throat, "Uh… we should get going…" Craig rose to his feet, brushing off his jeans and extended an arm to help Ellie up. She gratefully took his hand, rising to her feet as well. She watched as he lightly touched two fingers to his lips, then pressed them against the headstone, whispered "I love you," and turned to face her.

"Sorry," he mumbled, averting his eyes from her gaze, "This is probably weird for you…"

"No. Not at all," she said. His gaze lowered to his mother's grave once more and his eyes glazed over, a painful, longing expression in them. Ellie leaned in to him, resting her head on his shoulder as her hand loosely held his. "Come on… we should probably go soon," she spoke quietly, squeezing his hand gently.

"Yeah…" The two began walking out of the cemetery, her hand in his, absent mindedly letting them swing slowly as they moved.

"So… where do we go?" Craig hesitated, then reached into the pocket of his leather jacket, pulling out a large wad of money.

"Wherever you want."

"Oh my God… Craig, where did you get all of that?"

"So… um… should we just keep walking and see where we end up?"

"Oh… um… sure, I guess." Ellie replied, her eyes still focused on what could have been a thousand dollars in the fifteen year old's hand.

"I didn't steal it, if that's what you think."

"I wasn't, Craig… It's just… that's a lot of money…"

"Yeah… Yeah, it is." He frowned, looking repulsed by the money in his hands.

"Hey, it's getting kind of dark… Should we stay at the park tonight?" Ellie asked, her eyes now focused on the ground beneath her.

"Yeah…"

"Or we could go to a motel… I mean… if you want to spend some of the money… I have some if you don't… I mean, you just got out of the hospital… You should sleep in a bed… Unless you really want to sleep in the park-" She prattled on, then was silenced by Craig's finger lightly pressed against her lips.

"We can stay in the park tonight." He told her softly, and she blushed furiously at his touch.

Half an hour later, Ellie found herself standing with Craig at the entrance of the park, fingers still intertwined with his.

"This is the last time we'll get to spend the night here…" Ellie commented, memories playing through her mind as she gazed around the park.

"Then let's leave our mark."

"So what… we're runaways and vandals now?" She asked, confused, but allowed herself to be led over to the old oak tree that she often found herself sitting under.

"No... well… maybe." He smirked, then turned to her, "Have anything sharp?"

"Uh…like…?"

"I don't know… something to carve with?"

"Inexperienced vandal." She noted, smiling.

"Shut up," Craig said with a laugh. He got up and ran over to the playground. Ellie watched, amused, as he crawled around in the grass searching for something. Ten minutes later, he held his hand up, smiling with triumph.

"Got something," he informed her, walking back to the redhead.

"A loose screw from part of the playground. Safe park, isn't it?"

"Hey, I take Angie here." He defended, beginning to carve into the tree. A small part of his tongue stuck out of his mouth as he stared intently at the tree, concentrating.

"You look like a puppy dog." The redhead laughed.

"Well now I just want to scratch your name out of here," he joked, stepping back from the tree. Ellie stepped closer, looked at the words: **E.N. & C.M.**

Her smile faltered slightly as she had been half expecting, half hoping for the names to be encircled in a heart, like in some cheesy chick flick movie.

"Hey, maybe you could add… 'C.M. took twenty five and a half minutes to carve this'. Just a suggestion, though." The girl said with a laugh, which then turned to a squeal as Craig swung his arms around her waist and began tickling her.

"Stop!" She laughed, pushing his hands away. Turning around, she realized that had begun to drizzle lightly.

"I guess it's good that we have this vandalized tree to stay under," Craig commented with a smirk, sitting down. The girl sat next to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Craig?" She asked, after a period of silence.

"Yeah?"

"Where do you think we'll end up?"

"I dunno, El…" He answered, frowning slightly.

"Well… don't you care? I mean… when we get out of here… aren't you going to regret it? What if we're living on the streets for our whole lives? What if-"

"I haven't really thought about it… Sure, I'll miss Ashley and Sean… and I'll always miss Angie… But this? My decision to leave? At first I wasn't sure about it… but with you here…" He paused, "I don't think I'm ever going to regret it." It was silent for a moment, and he heard Ellie draw a shaky breath, felt her shiver against his side.

"Here." He spoke softly as he removed his leather jacket, placing it around the fragile girl. She mumbled a small thanks, leaning in closer to his embrace as he tightened his hold around her small frame.

"Night El," he whispered, closing his eyes, listening intently to the relaxed breaths of the girl as she slept soundly in his arms.

_If we could take the time to lay it on the line  
I could rest my head  
Just knowin' that you were mine  
All mine  
So if you want to love me  
then darlin' don't refrain  
Or I'll just end up walkin'  
In the cold November rain_

**_November Rain- Guns 'N Roses_**

* * *

**A/n: Sorry if there are any mistakes...  
I don't have anyone to proofread it right now... and I looked over it once, but I don't have time to do it again because I'm supposed to be studying for my finals right now.**


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